Richard Grannon clips & content tracker

Flameo

_Watched it, personally regret doing so. It was a load of childish nonsense. I hope he gets back on track, personally I’m probably never watching his channel again, for the foreseeable future.

Deef

Mostly Sam Vaknin with some Richard, video of body language and audience interaction, might be additional teachings?

Method in Narcissist’s Madness: Grannon-Vaknin in Bucharest 2h37m

Richard Grannon leverages Sam Vaknin’s synthesis the concepts of shared fantasy, dual mothership, entraining, self-states, and introjection to come up with the beginnings of a fix for narcissistic abuse.

Deef

RG promoting his new course, Unplug from the Matrix of Narcissistic Abuse, which I already bought and only did a quick watch through…

Are You Being Manipulated via Emotional Cocktails? 11m47s

This course easily took the longest to develop and took the heaviest toll on me personally. It seems that the narcissistic relationship actually submerges the target into a Matrix like virtual reality that Sam Vaknin describes as the “shared fantasy” (developed from a concept by a psychiatrist called Sander in ´89).

What I try to do is to make complex issues simpler and less intimidating so I began trying to make a full assessment of the threat and how the predation process operates in a step by step way in order to identify the damage done to us, where specifically and then how to recover.

Broadly the process breaks down into:

The Bait
(a big promise to a high leverage scenario offering access to a very scarce but highly desirable resource)

The Covert Contract
(that coerces our consent, making us a party to our own abuse)

The Shared Fantasy

These 3 steps obviously break down into smaller parts. The important thing is that they are ALL highly damaging and we must resolve ALL the issues in order to recover fully and to ensure we never fall prey to a narcissistically abusive relationship again.

This course presents a (roughly) 60 to 90 day protocol to do just that.
It also has an updated and streamlined “Break the Trauma Bond” to accelerate the recovery process.

Pre-release promo price of $119 and will supposedly increase to $297 after Friday.
Seems okay for $120, not sure if it’s worth $300.. though
https://www.richardgrannon.com/unplug-from-the-matrix-of-narcissism

This promo video makes relationships sound so damn weird, and transactional. Isn’t part of relationships getting to know the other person and enjoying their company?? Or is this love bombing with Narcissists super duper fast, instant fantasy bond or something??? Hmm… maybe I am missing out??

Deef

Some recent new releases which seem to be promoting his unplug from the matrix course, but they’re addressing other themes, some starting off well but then go on some unusual tangents.

TOXIC COMFORT is keeping you stuck 10m40s

Comfort is Dangerous?: 0:30
An evolutionary point of view: 0:31
The environment of today: 1:20
The past environment: 2:33
Laziness or Adaptive?: 3:01
The double-edged sword: 3:30
The danger of comfort: 4:32
The solution: 5:25
Thank you: 10:23

the only solution i can see to this,
is not just counter-intuitive, it might even be contrary to our genetic drives which is
we have to actively seek risk
we have to change our settings to be like okay
i shouldn’t be comfortable all the time, in fact every day of my life
i should be uncomfortable, i should be uncomfortable psychologically, i should be uncomfortable emotionally, i should be uncomfortable physically
for a period of time in a conscious boundaried way

I can agree that toxic comfort is a nice pointer, but his argument that it’s a default state… i’d challenge. I’d argue that our survival instincts are driven towards food, shelter, exploration, sex, etc. Comfort might be part of shelter, and a sense of home. And if you’re wasting away living a life of avoidance, neglect and lethargy; there’s depressive emotions which come up.

A more reasonable angle might be to talk about expanding one’s comfort zone, and trying to stay at a creative edge of slightly beyond one’s comfort level but not so far that one will just fall on their face…

Antifragile: Build true mental resilience 7m22s

This could be a continuation from the other one, but it’s not linked to it, that well…
tips from the video:
1- Spirituality
2- Social support
3- Acceptance
4- Emotional literacy

Dive into hippocampus & memory

There is One Reality | Handling the darkest days 16m50s

I suppose this is diving into spirituality…. starting with story of his black magic Malaysian Bomoh love binding spell, which led him into a muslim healer, then he dives into buddhism and I got lost a bit…

for a better deep dive into the Malaysian love spell and details of the menstrual blood aspect… from 2+ yrs ago

Richard Grannon Malaysian Love Spell Story 13m10s

You Found your WHY, now what? 11m13s

More tweaks with video editing and camera zooming and different angles. Better production quality.

The fundamentals of importance of having a positive aim… knowing what your WHY is is a good pointer, but figuring that out isn’t always that easy. Also sometimes people have a WHY already, they’re acting it out, but don’t consciously know it.. ergo repetition compulsion…

There’s multiple camera angles in this video with switching in between. The editing style seems different than other videos… Is Pierre doing some of the earlier ones, while this one was by the studio or someone else?
……

Anyway… I need to revisit the new course and then do some analysis of how these promo videos relate to it or not….. when I finally get to it, I’ll probably do most of that commentary in the 30dc thread….

Deef

Deef TOXIC COMFORT is keeping you stuck 10m40s

OMG….. I’m rewatching this trying to find good excerpts for a clip,….
but dude, it’s so much word salad and circular looping…. he seems to be linking comfort with safety… and looking at risk as automatic danger or the most dangerous thing…..

For a video titled toxic comfort, he seems to be arguing more for avoidance, comfort, and no risk tolerance…
oh.. and his argument on how to switch it seems to be changing your beliefs with word salad and brainwashing???

ok.. this is exhausting…… I think instead he’s just modeling how he is toxically addicted to safety, avoidance and comfort… and just paying lip service for the idea of growth, learning, discomfort, risk, etc. etc…

I think I can pull together a clip where he’s showing how much comfort has destroyed his mind….
…..
ok this is what I came up with to summarize and refine down that 10m40s

1m22s

While editing clips from Vaknin-Grannon latest video…. this clip on BPD imaginary friend & favorite person, had several mentions of comfort/soothing emotional regulation, which really reminded me of RG’s Toxic Comfort video, almost like he was obsessively fixated around an unmet need for comforting.

2m42s

Persephone

Deef BPD imaginary friend & favorite person

Tove Lo - Imaginary Friend
5m9s

Bradford

Deef Richards incessant nodding and “Ah ha, Ah ha, Yep” as well as other agreeing noises, physical movements, is his way of staying present and not dissociating.

These discussions of BPD by Vaknin are hitting a nerve and he is struggling to stay present in my view and may be too close to the bone for him.

Its fine when Richard talks all things BPD (dissociation?) but if he has to sit there and listen to it then it may be too confronting for him.

Deef

RG’s new book coming out this week:

from his youtube community tab:

My book “a cult of one” is out tomorrow.

3 years in development, I’m optimistic that it’s torturous birth will be karmically balanced by a reclaiming of sanity and good humour in its readers.

A Cult of One: How to Deprogram Yourself from Narcissistic Abuse

https://amzn.to/3qh0Zyi

$15.99 paperback and $0.99 kindle.. 158 pages

Are you truly taking care of yourself?

Or are you too busy taking care of everyone else?

So many of us find it easier to love other people than to love ourselves. We struggle to put our own needs first and have a hard time asking for what we want, let alone going after it. Instead, we attach ourselves to selfish people, trying over and over to win love from those who simply can’t offer it.

If that sounds familiar, you may be the victim of narcissistic abuse.

In A Cult of One, Richard Grannon exposes the insidious effects of narcissistic abuse and shares his own winding road to recognition and recovery. Through martial arts, mysticism, psychedelics, and psychology, spanning over four continents and forty-four years of life, Grannon discovered a systematic discipline for healing. Join him as he explains step by step—with courage, humor, and optimism—how to forge your own path to a better life.

Review
“Grannon helps us navigate the most difficult terrains of the human psyche with a unique combination of intellect, humor, and personal experience. Rather than keep his distance behind a cold glass partition, he reaches out to say, ‘This is what happened to me, and these are the techniques that helped me get through it.’” — Sean Ono Lennon, musician

“I deeply appreciate Richard Grannon’s work in helping people understand and overcome narcissistic abuse and cult brainwashing. While what was done to many of us might have been unavoidable and perhaps out of our control, the healing and preventative measures are very much in our control. Grannon inspires us to find our individuated self and interrelate with society as a more whole human, dropping essential knowledge for living a more meaningful life.” — Mark Vicente, film director

“To be on the receiving end of narcissistic abuse is disorienting, to say the least. It can also create destructive relationship patterns in the recipient that are hard to recognize and difficult to overcome. In this inspiring book, Richard Grannon combines the spiritual, the philosophical, and the practical. With his usual humility and good humor, he takes us through his own journey to triumph over the abuse that set him on a difficult path.” — Shawn Smith, MD, psychologist and author

“This book, filled with the author’s touching personal life’s experiences, gives priceless insights on how to live and survive our minds and the abuse of others. This is a must-read.” — Piero San Giorgio, bestselling author of Survive the Economic Collapse

“Richard Grannon’s work has been the most effective, practical, and relatable approach for properly making sense of the complexities within interpersonal relationships and internal struggles that I have found. He cuts straight to the source and always gives a very useful method to understand and deal with the issues at hand. I would highly recommend this book to anyone dealing with the adversities of life.” — PierreXO, musician

“I so appreciate Richard Grannon’s work. He is a major force in enlightening the world about the travesties and widespread incidence of complex PTSD. I continuously hear from many survivors about the therapeutic helpfulness of his work.” — Pete Walker, psychotherapist

Elven

Really liked this video, because I hate seeing self pitying people and it triggered a lot of disgust for seeing that weak victim mentality.
I had a really strong reaction to it and shared it on my story. And leaving comments like this SMH…

But today I realised that I was probably over-compensating, and how even though I try (too hard.) to mask it I’m internally in a big self pity cycle since my collapse after losing my FP.

Really just fuelling my depression so working on getting out of the toxic comfort and self pity mode. Anyways, hopefully this is helpful for others.

Deef

Some recent RG videos though they’re all production pieces and released incrementally…. outside of the London workshop….

Lessons From The Leper King | A Life of Resilience 13m

Don’t chase Happiness, Do this instead. 11m

Be careful who you pity. 13m24s

The Narcissists Matrix. 19m23s

Why can’t I just say NO?! 10m34s

I’m starting a movement, are you in? 12m03s

London Aug 2022 workshop 1h59m
“A Cult Of One” Healing Narcissistic Abuse, Codependency, CPTSD

STOP Procrastination & Perfectionism! 31m

I only feel safe when I am single. Please help! 14m49s

The experience of writing “A Cult of One” How to Deprogram Yourself from Narcissistic Abuse 15m30s

Deef

RG doing a live Q&A from a podcast studio today

There was a question that asked about repressed memories, and RG went on a rant that visual memories are worthless and not needed to be revisited… and essentially are totally worthless….

I wonder if that’s code…. that he personally has difficulties with getting lost in his own visions, or visual memories that might trigger emotional flashbacks for him?

hmm.. he talked about his Ayahuasca trip then revealed his sky gazing practice which takes him into naturally trips and reality melting thoughts……. I dunno, if this is a reveal that he’s very naturally psychotic? or has a super vivid imagination, possibly to the point of losing touch w/ shared reality?

Deef

I haven’t been keeping up with RG’s overly produced content… but he’s doing some instagram lives, which are a bit more interesting…

from today:

1h21m

This has a nice rant towards the end of formal opener 32min or so

and this is a live from 2 weeks ago
43m

Oh… he’s pulled in some people for live video chat, and that’s sometimes interesting to see some viewers just monologue stonewall over him….. and he stays mostly passive…

Deef

Finally found out something about Tentacle Croissant’s sudden ending…

54s

Richard, tentacle croissant, the burning question right uh
this is not going to be a tea-spill situation here because um I want to keep things mature and respectful,
but uh it’s just you know we’re going two different directions, that’s it, that’s all I can say,
I’m expecting that everyone assumes Pierre is the reckless abrasive probably said some shit to piss off Daddy Richie and his stability, his wisdom as a teacher and all these things and you know
there’s no hard feelings, I don’t have any hard feelings
but that’s definitely not the case, I did not disrespect in any way, uh it’s
long story short we really grew apart man, uh that’s it,
he has his own set of values, I have my obvious set of values now

I still suspect it was RG’s avoidant issues, along with ADHD disorganization that probably annoyed Pierre XO. Especially evident in the last TC episode where RG missed the premiere of their project together..

comments from the last TC episode:

Deef TC just started…. RG missed the premiere!! openly admits that he’s distracted and overworking or something…. now details of the background of making the video….. limited structure, lots of improv… very RG style..

Though it could also just be something as simple as burn out…. PXO is taking a break from streaming and might dive back to music and his older lifestyle.. RG retreated to all the overproduced content, and slowly back to doing some livestreams. Oh, and did he put off promoting his book?

Deef

Recent livestream promoting a new 30 day challenge, but also announcing that he’s no longer codependent…. somehow it got magically changed, fixed or something….. he attributes it to a ‘forward focused’ mindset..

No mention of breakups with Pierre XO or Sam Vaknin, though in the chat there were several questions and mentions around it..

48m32s

The forward focussed 30 day challenge is here https://www.richardgrannon.com/30daychallengeforwardfocussed

To do the FF challenge and then the unplug from the matrix narcissistic abuse 30 day challenge straight afterwards in febuary go here https://www.richardgrannon.com/30-day-challenge-plus-unplugged

Elven

I asked a question to him on another reel and now he released this.. Looks like there is being space made to talk about “The other side” of toxic.

Deef

excerpt from instagram stories:

The full version shows major BPD over-writing self-monologing and self-soothing and self hating traits. Maybe the holidays has brought out some raw honesty but also desperate self-gaslighting. I’ve got another clip coming with his version of relationship breakups in 2022 (SV & PXO) which also sound very very BPD like in understanding, and lack of self reflection.

4m11s

as a codependent you literally can’t do a relationship that across time
you won’t create a relationship you won’t co-create a relationship
where across time you don’t end up feeling abused
you can’t not end up feeling abused because you are a codependent
so your approach to the relationship is neurotic it’s dishonest it’s not down the line
it’s not like okay this is who I am
and this is what I want and this is what I’m creating
and if you’re not for that you need to toddle off
so that I can speak to somebody else
because most people live unindividuated possessed by shadow weighed down by the burden of culture and tribal expectation and they can’t find their authentic selves they just can’t do it
you don’t know yourself you don’t even know you you won’t because you won’t let you be you you won’t you won’t
you don’t have the bravery you don’t have the skill set you don’t have the strength it’s been beaten out of you to show up as you
so you’re like oh I can’t find a partner
well who is this I that we reference as codependents who’s that who’s that
The Narcissist for all their faults they have something called a fantasy self an ideal a hyper idealized fantasy self so that’s their delusion but they have that
they have an identity it’s false it’s false
but they have that
we have nothing we have nothing we’re ghosts we’re ghosts we’re just chameleons
what do you want babe whatever you want babe whatever you want babes
so then you go oh I feel exploited and used
well yeah because we’re wank socks we’re dildos we’re not
we don’t we don’t show up as anything else

and it’s not that you’re gonna find normal people and then insist on the on them instrumentalizing you and using you
I’m not going that far but I’m saying that if you did meet somebody who wasn’t going to instrumentalize you and use you
you’d just be turned off by them you just be like I’m not gonna get to do my favorite repetition compulsion psychodrama dance here
so I ain’t doing it like fuck this guy fuck this girl like they give you the Eck because they’re too normal or they’re too safe or they’re too sane
so you spew off all the same people
you get with some variation of a nutter and then you’re like oh no the wolf is eating my leg who would have thought that the what a wolf that this is just what they do would start wolfing
would start wolfing

so this is this game of hide and seek that we’re playing with ourselves and it’s masturbatory
and the point is to not grow up the point is to remain eternally a child
oh I can’t find a partner I try it doesn’t work out diddly D chase me around the back of the tree and back around again
no no no we’re terrified of being locked in time and then once because once you have a partner and you have kids you’re now basically you’re on a countdown timer that’s it
I’m 45 on my next birthday I’ve done this my entire life
it’s a game
there’s a narrative that we’re living to fulfill a pre-existing agenda so we’re playing a game
you’re seeking to fulfill a pre-existing narrative and you’re you’re retroactively post hoc creating the situations that fulfill the narrative
so I am the victim of abusive women incredibly cruel sadistic women who hate men and their dads aren’t around okay
so how about when I get with a girl
I say to her is your father around and if she says yes and I like him
I go box one ticked
see where I’m going with this?
it’s not flipping rocket surgery

it’s a game
so I’ve done this my entire life
we’re we’re terrified of being locked in time
it’s a game and the point is to not grow up
the point is to remain eternally a child
I have done this my entire life
point is to not grow up
it’s a game to not grow up it’s a game

1m20s

focusing what I do want in a structured disciplined way because it doesn’t happen naturally
I wouldn’t spontaneously focus on what I wanted
I had to teach myself
I’m still teaching myself to do that
but even in this awkward belabored artificial way after this year has gone by
there are multiple relationships that have dropped off
I didn’t mean for them to disappear
I didn’t mean to end them
but they dropped off when I stuck to my guns and focused on my values on what I wanted
what I would say with these relationships that have spontaneously dropped off in 2022
well my experience they just atrophied and fell away
is they were asymmetrical and
I wasn’t being honest within them
I wasn’t being my authentic self
I was fawning and I was over giving
and then when I stopped doing that
these people were just like F you Richard
like they got really really angry
and I was like okay
well if you’re gonna be angry with me
for being me, Ta-ra
like professional relationships personal relationships
they got really really angry
professional relationships but they got really really angry
personal relationships they got really really angry
F you Richard
and I was like oh okay well
if you’re gonna be angry with me for being me
if you’re gonna be angry with me Ta-ra

This video feels so BPD and maybe Quiet BPD in particular, I’m reminded of Dan C when he got angry at the group for attacking BPD Mark.

Suze

Deef These edits are gold, gave me a good laugh this morning. Ranty Richard feels the same as when I’m internally smacking/ranting at myself.

Deef

fresh off the presses…..

Sam Vaknin goes into details of his recent breakup, he doesn’t mention Richard, but who else would he be describing?? too many specifics that perfectly fit with RG.

18m0s

Based on a guy I used to hang out with and broke up with recently after an incredible incident of egregious badmouthing and backstabbing. So, a lot of what I say in this video is based on this rotten character.

Perfidious fake friends, who always claim to be the helpless and defenseless victims of manipulation and abuse and so, oh so in need of love. Women lap it up, of course.

Saviors, healers, fixers, rescuers are grandiose, covert (fake), and predatory

Wingman or backdrop for contrast as empathic, compassionate, altruistic, loving, caring, saintly.

Can’t see them coming, like a snake in the grass. Masquerade as good people but engage in perfidy and betrayal.

Actually rabidly misogynistic (closet gays), narcissistic, and psychopathic in dating (players)

Pick up line: self-appointed savior of damsels in distress from bad, mentally ill, dangerous, damaging so called abusers. “I am the alternative to the horrors of your relationship”.

But often savior is the abuser, not the “abuser” (Karpman: roles not fixed, playacting)

Select heartbroken, sad, damaged, crying, devastated, anxious, depressed women as targets.
They need to talk and end up being preyed on.

The “abuser” could be a friend or a colleague.
They are fake friends, seething with envy and resentment owing to inferiority complex.
Saving is omnipotence.

Badmouth and betray confidences for hours, not realizing that their words are reported back to the “abuser”
(example: this guy and me, I got info from multiple sources about his badmouthing and egregious backstabbing, but I refused to believe it, he is that good at faking).

Savior/rescuer attempts to create alliance/coalition with victim against abuser.

Predatory 3 Ss: save you, sex you, scram (“not another fantasy”, “not ready for a relationship”)

May believe their own lies about saving or rescuing as their “job” (abuser all bad, they all good splitting): caters to grandiosity, unboundaried sexual needs

Sam’s 2nd announcement of breakup with RG, more explicitly stated
1m30s

Richard Grannon I am not working with him
Richard Grannon I am not collaborating with him
Richard Grannon
many of you have written to me to ask about my participation in some kind of product that Grannon has issued or published or is selling or whatever
I want to clarify I am not associated directly or indirectly with anything that Richard Grannon does
definitely not with his products thankfully is out of my life for good
I am not working with him I am not collaborating with him not now not forever in any shape way manner or form in any Forum in any setting in any seminar ever again no Grannon thank you
I hope I made myself clear once and for all
stop writing to me
I have no idea what this guy is telling you
nor do I want to be involved in any of his how to put a gently commercial Enterprises
Richard Grannon I am not working with him
Richard Grannon I am not collaborating with him
no Grannon no Grannon thank you

Deef

I caught the 2nd half of this live, and was interacting some with RG with an alias, there’s portions towards the end where they’re grilling RG indirectly or directly, about having to role model behaviors that they’re touting or critiquing, watch RG squirm or just stay silent… lol

1h39m

some excerpts of my comments which caught RG’s attention, and also show how susceptible he is to his follower’s feedback and approval.

The enemies comment, was KK & FF challenging RG’s automatic demonizing of opponents as enemies, of which I added the comment to plant a seed that RG’s shadow might actually enjoy conflict, and exerting passive aggression through seeing other perspectives as enemies to kill or separate from.

Suze

Deef This is so sneaky!

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