Lee Hammock Mental Healness tracker (Honest Narcissist perspective)

Deef

Stumbled upon Lee’s video on reactive abuse, and I think he captures more of the plain charming Narcissistic point of view, Vaknin can be excessively academic and cold. Lee seems to be more upfront, simple, and maybe more American?

I really liked his breakdown on Reactive Abuse, he describes the power game aspect of it quite well.
13m02s

and his latest video - Emotions & The Narcissist
19m46s

Welcome to The Narcissists’ Code. If this is your first video, my name is Lee and I am a self aware narcissist.
I’ve been in therapy for my personality disorder since 2017 and it has definitely changed my life because without it, I would have lost everything.

The point of these videos is to help bring awareness from the other side of the narcissistic *buse spectrum.
All my videos give perspective on why many narcissists do what they do and the possible different reasons behind them. The *buse victims get validation and the Narcissists (those that are willing) get to see that you can get help and that you are not alone.

His Tiktok https://www.tiktok.com/@mentalhealness
Instagram https://www.instagram.com/mental_healness
Podcast https://anchor.fm/mentalhealness

Onnaloves

Deef HAHAHAHAHAHAHABA OMG he thinks he’s logical 🙂 damn. That was the first thing that popped out his mouth I spluttered laughing at. If someone says they are ““logical” to me - I’m like uhohhhhh.
i USED TO THINK my lack of emotions was a sociopathic trait. The difference is they control it, I cannot understand what I feel. LOGICAL MY ASS LMAO

NYE

I find this guy fascinating. I guess self-awareness is a rare trait among diagnosed narcissists. Or perhaps I’m hoping against reason and experience, that the cluster b in my life can have as much self awareness. But then what would I do?

NYE

And, Deef, I’m wondering whether you might be interested in hosting a self-aware (possibly diagnosed) borderline. And, no, I’m not talking about my STB-ex. This guy is very smart on personality disorders. He ran a BPD support group that used to meet at Suburban Hospital before Covid. I met him at Friends / Family of Borderlines support group that used to meet at Northern Virginia Mental Health Institute, and had several private consultations with him over the last few years. Might be interesting for your group.

Deef

Self-awareness doesn’t equate to impulse control.. but I admire the upfront honesty and genuineness of Lee…
I have argued in the past that a narcissist wants to be up front and show his/her true colors, it’s just the codependent doesn’t want to see it, fights against it, or just rejects it when the NPD is too honest.

NYE hosting a self-aware (possibly diagnosed) borderline

This sounds interesting…. forward some more details on him to me, or some more backstory… I’m open to include more voices and guest speakers for future meetings…

NYE

He’s a fairly successful artist. This is my recollection of his story. About 15 years ago he went to the hospital with some serious condition. Bloodwork indicated his stress hormones (?) were way out of whack. He started trying to determine the source of his stress. His daughter suggested it might be BPD. He’s studied the field of personality disorders. I think he exercises impulse control. He’s probably got a side order of narcissism as well. He thinks he’s very intelligent, which is probably true. I haven’t mentioned the possibility of meeting this group so I’m not sure he’d agree to meet with us.

NYE

And one more thing. He doesn’t have patience for co-dependents who see themselves as victims.

Deef

NYE doesn’t have patience for co-dependents who see themselves as victims

This makes him sound even more genuine… lol.. He could be a useful resource, a BPD who’s managed a level stability, or just able to break down 1st person perspective isn’t that common..

So what’s he doing now? Does he have any public platform or just does side personal consults?

Deef

The latest from Lee Hammock

Honest breakdown of using silent treatment as a weapon, this is a topic that haven’t explained that well before, as I’ve had limited experience with it… though my ex would occasionally do it when she would get triggered and flooded, and shut down.. not like Lee saying he’s doing it with more torturous motives.

15m12s

NYE

My STB-ex would combine the silent treatment with gas lighting to great effect. When I called her out she would deny she was doing anything. “No, I’m not giving you the cold shoulder. I just don’t have anything to say right now. ”

NYE

His name is Mark Dassoulas. He has a website (https://www.markdassoulas.com/) for his artwork, but nothing on his interest in personality disorders. At one point he was writing a book on the subject. Also, he always describes himself as a former borderline, i.e., he’s recovered. Not sure one can recover from a cluster b disorder, or does one simply become self aware and able to exercise executive control. Let me know if you’re interested and perhaps I could introduce him to you via email or text.

Deef

NYE Let me know if you’re interested and perhaps I could introduce him to you via email or text.

Sure, I’m interested, he sounds like a good resource, and we’ll see if he has any interest in joining a meetup, or participating in other ways.. Not surprising that he’s an artist, seems like that’s pretty common with BPD’s, lots of creative aesthetic talent..

NYE

I’ll reach out to him and see what he says. I’ll have my sons staying with me this weekend so I’ll suggest he join us the following Sat., March 27. I might share the link to some of your content so he can get an idea of the group dynamics. He’s an interesting guy; I hope he can join a meeting.

NYE

So it looks like my recovered borderline friend will be able to join us this Saturday. I forwarded the link to “join the waiting list.” Should be interesting.

Deef

Yay… and Sat’s format is a bit more open, so more room to adjust if he wants to contribute more.
You can forward him the zoom link, to save him the hassle of signing up on the meetup group and rsvping and such… unless he wants to also go that route…

weird that we’re doing this in the Lee Hammock thread, maybe that’s a clue for me to reach out to Lee and see if he might be interested in doing a zoom visit… he’s still starting out, so he might be game for the exposure opportunity..

Deef

The latest Lee Hammock video, here he’s evaluating Derrick Jaxn’s recent apology video from getting caught cheating as stereotypical narcissist strategy (one that he admires, too)…

13m13s

Here’s the referenced apology video of Derrick
7m36s

I hear there might be another mistress that’s come out making it more messy? But I haven’t followed this scandal or Derrick’s videos.. so not that up to date with all the details..

Deef

Lee just hosted a Q&A on youtube live. I threw out a few questions, and eventually sensed out and he openly admitted at least 2 times, that his online persona is an exaggerated act.
If you meet him in person, he would come across as a low level Narcissist in real life, and uses humor to mask his neediness. The deeper questions he dodged or glossed over, he doesn’t think that deep. But that’s actually a positive, as he’s more realistic to what’s normal for a Narcissist. Listening to Vaknin and other overly cerebral narcissists, we can get intimidated by their memory & intellect, not realizing they lack the natural instincts and charisma that Lee has.

60m

NYE

Hammock and Vaknin both said they got help after hitting rock bottom. That’s also true of most addicts.

NYE

Regarding humor, I think narcissists use humor to get us to lower our defenses.

Deef

Childlike humor, humming, playing with his hair are tells of his nervousness.

Excerpt that captures his experience of guilt, amazing defenses to just shake it off or re-write and shift blame on the fly.
1m24s

Deef

Deef his experience of guilt, amazing defenses to just shake it off or re-write and shift blame on the fly.

Another video of Lee covering his almost automatic mechanism for re-writing feelings of guilt, or very quickly shifting blame.

Onnaloves

Deef LMFAO oh I remember this!!! Yes I agree with him. Guilt is like a spectrum for me too. Usually, after my monsters have come, I am guilt free. I have no survivor guilt. I just shake off rape and start over. Rape, is never my fault. The monsters make me feel good about it and replace the event with alternate reality. I know it never happened, but that’s what my body remembers. It remembers pleasure instead of pain. It detoxifies me and I will often wake up giving birth to alien giant maggots chrysalis things that the monsters take away for themselves. I’m like their fuck queen lololol